Tribulation

Have you ever imagined or pictured yourself in the verge of falling into darkness or to a world sought to grief you? Well, that's what I was feeling then. A feeling of disappointment, remorse and repugnance. It was as if the world had tumbled upon me, imprisoned me in a foreboding abyss, even slightest ray of bliss had forsaken me. I just hate the fact that the more I reckoned my advent future, the more it was becoming the world that I had imagined. Devastated.

I feared of failure. I felt failure had haunted and plagued me ever since. Whatever I do, or done, it was only coming down to one word, Failure. Before, I had never felt the aptness of this lost, this agony, this pain that was so excruciating. The failures that I had before were just minor and insignificant. Sometimes, when I am contemplating, I thought that as we grew up, our maturity and sense of responsibility will ameliorate, even our intellect will exalt drastically. But when I grew up, I knew, that the mischievous belief that I had then was just never going to come true. Failure, Failure and yet again Failure. I hate myself, hate for ever becoming a fiasco in everything, the charisma that I had in me was depleting. Even my friends had lost confident in me. I could only murmured failure, I felt useless and worthless. It was the only sickness that has no remedy. A total dysfunction.

One day, I saw this anime-NARUTO. It was about a boy with a grotesque monster implanted in him which gave him the extra boost of unbelievable, inimitable power. But this only factor had caused him his one and only childhood. Everyone in the village had treated him like a taboo or some kind of diabolical abomination. He was plunged into sadness and sorrow.................Lol........ I am telling the whole story again, aren't I. Well, to make it short, he was just like someone whom i sought to be, or admired and idolize. His courage, determination and obstinacy was just too overwhelming. He tenaciously grip on to life even he knew that the opponent was going to obliterate him completely. And this had caused a sudden surge of electricity to run through me. I felt that I had opened my eyes for the first time after a long hiatus. Ironically, I felt repent too, that I was even able to give up that easily. The next day, a new individual had been born, and his name shall be call NORATU.......................... Well, that was silly. Haha.